You won’t be alone if you decide to move an aging parent in with you. One out of every four caregivers lives with an elderly or disabled love one they care for. How do you know when it’s the right time for your parent to move in with you?
Spend some time considering these 10 questions to help you make that decision. If there are other family members that live in your home, have them sit with you and talk about the questions, and your answers, together.
1. What kind of care will your parent need?
Consider their current physical and mental health. If they’re still relatively healthy, now might be the perfect time to move them in with you.
Many people don’t consider caring for an aging parent in their own home until they have a health setback or crisis. By then, it can be too late for you to care for them by yourself. If that’s the case, many parents can still stay at home with their kids with the help of a home health aide.
2. How much assistance and supervision can you provide?
Though you have the best of intentions, you must be realistic when you consider the time you’ll need to invest in caregiving. Along with caring for your parent, you’re still going to need time for:
- Socializing with friends
- Time for yourself
You need to carefully consider if you’ll have the time and energy you’ll need to take on this responsibility.
3. How well do you get along?
Consider the history of your relationship with your parent. You’re going to be living in close quarters and spending a lot of time in each other’s company. If you’ve had challenges with your relationship, they’re not going to disappear when your parent moves in. Sometimes family members bond when they live with one another, but sometimes the conflicts worsen.
It won’t always be a bed of roses. You’re going to have arguments, but consider how long it’s taken for you to reconcile in the past. Sometimes the caregiver has to set the example for the parent when it comes to forgiveness and reconciliation.
4. Is your home aging adult-friendly?
Ideally, it’s best for your parent if they live on the first floor to avoid having to take the stairs regularly and risk falling. If they have mobility issues, you might need to install a ramp leading up to the front door. Bathrooms need to be large enough to accommodate a walker or a wheelchair.
If you don’t have extra room, you may need to convert a den or living room into a bedroom. This can be costly and inconvenient. Making your home adult-friendly may require you to give up some of your valued personal space.
5. Will your parent contribute financially?
Pooling your resources may help with making your home senior-friendly. It will also help with the increased food bill, utilities, and services like cable and Internet. If you’ll need some help, but your parent can’t provide it, you might need to talk with your siblings about helping out.
6. How do your spouse and children feel about the move-in?
If you don’t have their support, it’s going to be a real uphill battle for you. If your spouse and your parent have a history of not getting along or your children aren’t willing to chip in with helping with the extra chores that will need to be done, having your parent live in your home may not be the best idea.
7. How will your parent fit in?
As a family, it’s best to establish guidelines and boundaries up-front. Your parent will need to be able to live by the rules of your house, and you may need to be flexible concerning some of those rules.
8. Will your family be able to adjust to the lifestyle changes?
You’re going to have an older adult living in your home, and it will require some lifestyle changes. Lighting, noise levels, menus, sleeping arrangements, sharing a television – all of these are likely to be subject to change when your parent moves in. The willingness of your family to make adjustments without being resentful will be needed.
9. Do you have the time necessary to take this on?
Having your aging parent move in will require a significant investment of your time, especially if you’re not going to have the support of other family members that may not live near you or aren’t willing or able to help out. If your parent can’t be left alone, needs help with personal care, needs to be driven to doctor’s appointments or grocery shopping, someone is going to have to take them.
10. Will your parent have a social network available?
Your parent needs someone outside of the family to socialize with to keep them active and involved with life. If they’re moving in from a distance and losing their network of friends, you’ll need to help them find activities in your area where they can meet and socialize with others.
We Can Help!
If it’s time for your aging parent to move in and you can’t do it alone, Dependable Senior Care is here to help. We can assist with companionship services, personal care, hourly care, dementia care, respite care, and more.
Contact us today at (800) 500-9192, or by visiting www.dependableseniorcare.com, for a free consultation with a Care Coordinator to discuss your care needs. We’ll create a personalized care plan for you to meet your requirements. Dependable Senior Care is here for you!